


Because loving him hurts

by Fanphasegirl



Category: CSI: Crime Scene Investigation
Genre: Awkward Romance, Bombs, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-15
Updated: 2020-08-15
Packaged: 2021-03-04 17:35:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25290247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fanphasegirl/pseuds/Fanphasegirl
Summary: Melody Cripps is in love with Greg but thinks it doesn’t matter. Doing her best to focus on the never ending loop that soon becomes her life. Then when Greg’s lab blows up she never leaves his side. The conflict within herself growing ever so loudly. Sarah comes in to get the answer to the question she’s always wondered but had yet to ask. And though she has a lot to try to avoid due to circumstance, Melody manages to get her say in. The outcome: maybe things are better left unsaid after all.
Relationships: Greg Sanders/Original Female Character
Kudos: 2





	Because loving him hurts

**Author's Note:**

> Characters: Sanders, OC, Sara  
> TRIGGER WARNING: Some topics may or may not exist in the story. Mentioned in detail that may result in distress/ discomfort. Examples of these topics are suicide, murder, abuse, or possible rape/ sexual harassment type situations. Please read at your own discretion.
> 
> Author's note: I own Nothing. All respective owners reserve the right to their materials and content. Bear in mind there are some changes regarding the story that differentiate from the T.V. show/ original content. I am still learning the personalities of each character and how to portray them so bear with me. Feel free to check out some of my other stories. No overly rude comments tolerated. Enjoy.

The room was silent, but all Melody could hear was that god awful _KA-BOOM_ in her ears. Followed by the glass shattering on all sides from the force of Greg’s lab exploding. The last thing she remembered was seeing Sara falling on Gil.

Having been tailing him closing. Trying to speak with him no doubt. Right before she could look to her left to see Greg, everything went to hell. She didn’t even remember the blood curdling scream of his name that left her voice so raw.

Though the constant reassurances that it happened from the team was all it took to convince her. If only it had stopped there. Unfortunately, the embracement continued. Starting with Catherine, who was the one who had brought the tears to her attention the other day while she was in the room questioning Greg. Naturally he had no clue she was there and she had asked everyone on staff not to say a word; she knew someone would speak eventually but why not at least try to prolong it?

Now here she was sitting in the chair with a blanket the nurses had given her. Her knees pulled tight to her chest. Thank god she was as flexible as the showgirls she’d met working in Vegas. Otherwise, siting in such a position in such a way for so long may be too uncomfortable for her own good. As for the nurses, they had constantly checked on her. Trying to convince her between eating or taking a walk throughout the day. Melody was never _overly_ stubborn. She knew what they were trying to do. And that they knew her by reputation from Medical Career based meetings. She worked as a nurse tech most days. Also allowed to be a consultant for the team. Hoping to, one day, be the one who also doubled as a newbie in the forensics labs.

It was all part of that moment everyone goes through in life where you don't know what you want to do or where you belong. It was thanks to this, Melody worked on the same shift as Greg. Having a preference for the graveyard, she didn't have to fight hard to get her own spot. Mainly due to Gil always having her back. She soon felt like one of the team, for the first time in her entire life. Greg was just another perk. Funny, sweet, honest. She met him once and knew he was different; at least in her eyes. Every day she went to talk to him for a couple hours at a time. She would do her best to keep from being a distraction. Even going as far as to let him know to tell her any time he wanted, or needed, her to leave. But, he never kicked her out. Instead he just continued to make her laugh. And, every day, he made her shine a little bit brighter.

That was just the start of it all. After that, she kept a close eye on him. Backing him whenever Nick or anyone else started acting like an asshole. Joking or not, Melody would keep it classy but sharp tongued when defending her taboo crush. That only drawback to her, was that Greg didn't seem to notice. He would be impressed by her ability to shit talk anyone who came her way, sure. However, it almost seemed like he approved of it.

That was when Melody started slowly. Her pace with Greg being cautious but assured. Questioning if some part of him might have thought she was a crap person. When she didn't come around for three days- Greg went to her. Taking her to lunch (Dinner for them). Asking her about her life. Though Melody tried to say quiet, Greg talked her into opening up. Starting with the usual nice guy lines. Melody caught on, but it didn't stop her from blushing as she listened.

"You don't have to tell me if you're not ready."

"N-no. I trust you", she struggled to speak. Playing with the straw of her drink as she continued, "It's just...no one's...r-really...asked me...anything like...t-that...in...a...while".

Greg seemed to have a positive response to the small confession Melody gave him. From there, she gained some happy confidence and moved into talking about her past with him. There wasn't much to tell, though. She had been disowned at a young age and left to a studio apartment by herself until she graduated high school. After that, she went on to college with average grades and a common ethnicity. This meant scholarships were out of the question. She grabbed the first degree she could, then got the fuck out of dodge. Coming the run into Gil at an antique bookstore with a small café out front. She had taken a liking to the location and used it as a getaway from work. But when the manager was under suspicion for a murder, she stepped in to talk to the detective investigating. Gil new the shop since it was a place he went to get more private pieces he had a hard time finding. Melody was given a pass to consult the case since she had enough of a grey area to work with that it wouldn't count as 'personal'. The investigation was directed to a young woman who had been stalking the store's manager and the rest is history. It shouldn't have been, but when Gil asked Melody to stay on permanently, the young lady was surprised. Kind of happy- but more afraid.

Now she wasn't afraid of the dead bodies, or the death threats, or even the lack of a real paycheck. She was afraid of the potential. Up until now she had been so independent. Studying everything and anything that struck her fancy. Growing to know so much so she didn't have to focus on what she didn't know. Now, here Gil was. Asking her to throw it all away on a chance that she might meet some decent people who like her. She wasn't ready to handle the rejection. Then again, she wasn't ready to pass on a chance to poke dead bodies with sticks either. There was no way to win. So she agreed. A hearty handshake attached with the ridiculous saying, "If the murderers don't come to regret it- you just might, old man."

Since then, its been one case after another. Sometimes doubles. Melody was starting to wish she could see into the future so she could build some kind of a life outside of work. Then again, with all the drama going on, she didn't need a lot of private time. There were some days were just watching people in the building interact was all the entertainment she needed. Unspoken loves, scandalous secrets, and testosterone backed egos clashing. Good god- when did life get so overwhelming?

Despite her better judgment, Melody asked the most personality defining trait question ever. Thinking to herself, 'And why the hell was it so much fun to watch?' 

Melody came back to the present situation. Soon she closed her eyes and took a deep breathe. She could smell him from the few feet away she was from his place on the bed. She opened them to look at his face, which had been facing her for the last three hours. Causing her to make the mental note to rotate him soon so he wouldn’t develop bed sores. Wondering if he would wake up this time around. Greg had been sleeping for so much longer than she expected. When he did wake up, it was usually to stir or shake off a nightmare. Once in a while, when she felt brave enough, she would place a hand on his forehead and run her hand back through his hair and whisper to him.

“It’s ok dear, no one can hurt you here. I’m with you- so go back to sleep.”

Sometimes he’d whimper; other times he would open his eyes then close them just as quickly. More or less responsive to her. Which made her chest tighten and her stomach curl. Melody was careful about what she said cuz she knew that patients can still hear you in this kind of state. And Greg was already known for being a good actor. She smiled at how he started to drool on his pillow. Melody reached out to pat his head when she heard the door open. Keeping her head towards Greg but shifted her eyes to the clock in front of her on the wall; reading 10:39 p.m.

“Hey, Mel. Not surprised your still here. You always were protective.” 

Melody didn’t have to look to know it was Sara. Melody took a long I take of air. Releasing it slowing as she had a single thought cross her mind.

_My only day off in weeks, no ability to sleep since I just got done with a case before the shit-storm, and now- Sara is here to bug the crap outta me and Greg._

Melody was so ready to play the ‘he can’t have too many visitors’ card, or the ‘get out or you can be an example on the morgue examination table for rookies’ card. She always messed with Sara that way. And why wouldn’t she? Sara was in love with Gil; who was everything Melody had ever dreamed of in a father. Mel was orphaned and abandoned so family was often too short a pickings for her. This little background bio played a bigger part in the young consultants eagerness to help than anyone would have expected. It would also come to serve as one of the biggest ways Melody would tear herself apart. Meanwhile, she finally exhaled the air from her lungs slowly in a long, deep breath. Being sure to sigh her exhale to exaggerate her not so well hidden irritation.

“Helloooo Saraaaaah”, she mumbled pretending to sound tired. She rolled her eyes thinking to herself, 'maybe Greg can help prefect my acting.' That got her to smirk to herself and finally look at the other woman.

“Well don’t you just look like a bag of sunshine.” She spoke sarcastically.  
“Still makes me brighter than you dumb braud.” Mel shot back.  
“Ya well for one so bright you sure need a shower.” She waved a hand in front of her face indicating an unpleasant odor.  
“Sorry not me, Greg hasn’t showered though. Plus Guests can use the bathroom.” Melody pointed down to her dearest medicated sleeper. That made Sarah giggle. What got Melody on her guard was when Sarah stood on the other side of the bed and locked her eyes on Greg with the one indescribable look Mel hated most. To her it always meant trouble; emotional this is why I hate your dumbass bee-yatch trouble. 

“Wow, you really care about him don’t you?” asked Sarah. There it was; fighting words.  
“Ya, ya I do. What’s it matter to you? Do you always think you have a right to other peoples’ business when they’re not a suspect in a case?” Towards the end Melody raised her voice a bit but kept it low so not to wake Greg. She knew she sounded as pissed as she felt because she was doing the one thing everyone in the lab made fun of her for; making herself sound like the young female version of the godfather. Damn.

“Hey, Hey I didn’t mean anything by it.” Sarah put up her hands defensively to call Mel off. No doubt her ‘dad’ told her about that trick. “I was just…I don’t know envious I guess.” She gave a nervous chuckle.  
“I’m sorry too.”

Melody looked down slightly embarrassed by what she did. She used the term slightly loosely because she always followed her gut. Her instincts and her ambition are what got her this far and she promised herself a long time ago that she would never go back on ‘em. She knew she got mad because Sarah was the reason she gave up Greg so long ago. Sure they flirted but he flirted with all the pretty girls. And when the other pretty girls like Sarah were around, he flirted with them over her. She wasn’t about to play second choice but she couldn’t help but go back and do it all over again. Maybe that’s why she insisted on staying. No one else would get in her way here. NO competition meant no crying to get to sleep. Damn him. Damn her. Damn fucking everything. Melody fekt her face heat up in rage and her fists clench around each other for restraint. She pushed and pushed so she would never break. Dad was persistent about emotional control. She refused to disappoint him by being like everyone else.

“Mel, you ok?” Sarah’s question broke Melody’s thought train.  
“Ya I’m sorry?” she sat back and pulled the blanket over her shoulders just under her neck. Sarah shifted her eyes downward then back to Mel before she spoke again.  
“How do you do it?” She asked monotone, as she often does when confused or constipated Mel could never tell. Then Sarah spoke again a bit louder.  
“How do you just leave things this way? I mean, doesn’t it bother you? Especially at times like this?”  
“No!” Melody caught herself before she spoke further. Remember Greg.  
“No. Unlike you I can separate myself- “  
“Bullshit.” Sarah interrupted. “Come on there’s gotta be something more to it.”  
“Ok how’s this? I’m not stupid and- and selfish. I don’t demand what I can’t have then stomp my feet 

Because loving him hurts, but leaving him behind hurts more.


End file.
